Things are going to go wrong at your wedding. You will plan and anticipate perfection, but they will go wrong. Please accept this. There are some things that truly are catastropic and can happen. Make a list of what those would be. It will look something like this:
1 - We don't get married.
2 - Death.
3 - Grave injury.
4 - The reception hall burns down.
5 - My parents forget about the wedding and board a plane to Bermuda and miss the whole thing (not likely, but...)
Beyond that, things are looking up. It's still your wedding day. You will be the prettiest person there. You will be the focus of all attention. You will be starting your life with the person you love. All of those people in the room? They trekked their butts through hell or highwater to see you! (and for the open bar.)
So, barring the above, the below should not bother you:
-There is an uneven number of pink and peach roses on table 13.
-Your mother is wearing an ugly brooch that totally clashes with the theme of the wedding.
-Your new husband's mother started her own receiving line. (Though, after the whole shebang is over, you can think of her as a bitch just for this.)
-Your second cousin, once removed brought her 2.5 month old infant because he's still nursing and now people are looking at him when they are looking at you because it's your day and they should be looking at you.
There are obviously many, many, many other possible annoyances that will occur on your wedding day. But please remember, it's your wedding. If other people screw up or do something that annoys you, that's what they do, but you are the only one who can make the choice to be annoyed by it and let it ruin your day.
And if something does annoy you, don't let the guests see it. I have personally seen a handful of brides have complete meltdowns in the middle of their own weddings. It is not pretty, and that's the only thing your guests will remember and talk about. It's the only thing I remember from those weddings. There is nothing worse than the visual of a bride at her cocktail party holding a drink in one hand, a cigarette in the other and screaming at the groom in front of all of her guests. That vision has been embedded in my memory for life.
And never throw your bouquet, that's expensive.
Oh, and if you get frustrated because you can't yell about something, don't drink it away. Vomit doesn't look pretty on a wedding gown, and your guests will say unkind and very true things about you after they leave the wedding.
And while we're talking about this stuff, if you and your spouse plan on leaving each other's side for any point of the reception, set a time limit for when you need to meet up again. Really. You don't want to be waiting in your bridal suite because your new spouse is out partying with friends. Really. Having that blow-up at the morning after brunch will also leave an impression in the minds of your guests.
Hi,
I saw your comment on Love is Blonde...I take it you plan weddings as well? Can I link this post? My Saturday bride was such a snarling mongrel, all the groomsmen apologized to me, my assistant, the hotel staff and other guests for her bad behavior. I just feel bad that she refused to enjoy her wedding, which was so, so nice. Cheers and come on over to Chock Late if you're so inclined.
Posted by: Meepers | Tuesday, October 10, 2006 at 02:04 AM